Dear diary,

I'm not a fan of self help books, I never have been. I find it rather annoying to have a book of reference as if everyone deals with situations the same way. The titles are much worse "How to make any girl fall in love with you" or "How to live a fulfilling life". Yeah okay, I'll pass but thank you.

I think I may need one of those books though. " How to keep your cool when you meet a girl you like!"

I honestly feel so comfortable or maybe too comfortable talking to her. Its all so natural that the first thing I do now when I wake is want to call or text or  check for a voice note or listen to any old ones. It used to be coffee, now its her voice. "Insert eye roll here* Its a very intoxicating and scary thing when your world is unraveled so quickly that everything seems more natural knowing she's there than when she's not.

I guess you have already figured out that I met someone. This may be the first time I have written about a woman whom is currently in my life. Maybe that's a good sign.

I laugh a lot when we speak, I'm not sure if it because she force fed  me a bucket of butterflies or that she's truly a person that can make me laugh. Either way, I'll take it.

The stupidity that comes with these feelings are the worst. I feel like a teenager in a sense but well.

I guess at the end of it all, it will be up to Her and I to figure out if we can  work. Its not everyday that I meet someone who sparks and captures my interest so I guess that means I'm in.

I am aware of my silent fans and the vocal ones. I'm hoping you are nice people but maybe some of you aren't and that's okay. There's nothing anyone can do in this case but perhaps if you'd wish me luck with this?

Joan